“Families have always been my greatest teachers, I carry what they’ve taught me into every setting I work in.”
Tovah Feehan’s path into the world of medically complex care didn’t start with a textbook or a formal training. It started with a question:
How do we make therapy meaningful for the whole family?
It came from sitting across the table from families who were juggling way more than a feeding schedule. It came from watching the stark difference between families who had strong support networks and those who were still trying to access the basics.
Today, Tovah is a pediatric speech-language pathologist who specializes in feeding and swallowing. She is also the founder of Pediatric Feeding Partners, and a founding board member of Caffeinated Caregivers. But what truly defines her is not the list of credentials, it’s how she shows up: present, grounded, and all-in on the power of real partnership with families, not just “treatment plans.”
“This caregiver wanted to build a world that would include him, and she was doing it.”
During her clinical fellowship year, Tovah met a caregiver who left a permanent mark on her. She was raising multiple children in an inter-abled family, holding down a full-time job, and managing a packed therapy schedule….all while planning for her disabled son’s adulthood. About a year later, that same mother opened a café employing adults with disabilities and went on to pursue a Ph.D. in nursing focused on equitable care for disabled adults.
“It was astonishing, she seemed capable of anything! I also recognize that part of it is her DNA and her means to build a support network for herself and her family.
But not every moment of her work was full of inspiration, some were deeply humbling.
“On the flip side, I encountered families facing numerous barriers, leading me to wonder how I could make any impact at all,” Tovah shares. “Some didn’t have access to basic necessities like food or even a crib for their baby.”
Those experiences forced her to zoom out and reconsider everything she had been taught. Her clinical goals and recommendations suddenly felt meaningless if they didn’t fit the realities families were living with.
“I realized my support had to meet families where they were, and make sense in the context of their lives. Otherwise, what’s the point?”
It was a lesson that stuck. She saw both ends of the spectrum, from families with fierce advocacy and vision for the future, and others just trying to survive day to day, with everything in between. That perspective followed her as she moved from home care into a pediatric hospital setting, and it continues to guide her approach today.
“I’m always asking myself: What does this look like at home? How can we make this meaningful and functional for the family?”
“Inclusion shouldn’t be an afterthought. It should be how we start.”
Over time, her work became less about “fixing” and more about building real relationships.
Tovah began to notice how systems asked families to constantly adjust, rather than changing to meet their needs. She saw that fear and bias often came from a lack of exposure, and she became committed to helping shift that.
“We need to talk about what happens when we don’t have exposure to people who move, look, or communicate differently than we do. That’s when fear sets in, and we start to treat people as ‘other.’”
She dreams of a future where families of children with medical complexity are not only supported, but celebrated. Where inclusion isn’t an afterthought. Where classrooms, books, and communities are filled with people of all abilities. Where difference isn’t just accepted, it’s understood and appreciated. As a mom herself, she’s raising her kids with that same awareness.
“It’s not enough that my kids are ‘kind.’ I want them to genuinely appreciate people of all abilities.”
This people-first philosophy is what she’s brought to Caffeinated Caregivers since day one. Her work there reflects her deep belief that caregivers should never be treated as side characters in their own story.
“There are always options. It’s okay to ask questions. It’s okay to push back. Actually, it’s necessary.”
If Tovah could sit across the table from every caregiver reading this, she’d tell you one thing that she means deeply:
You are the expert on your child. And your voice matters.
She also wants you to know that there are professionals out there who care. There are providers who get it, those who really do want to do this work with you.
“Please know this: there are providers who truly care about you and your child. You matter to us. You’re not alone in this.”
Tovah’s not shy about naming where the system falls short. She’s also not afraid to say we can and should expect more.
“We talk so much about systems of care, but if those systems don’t reflect the people they’re meant to serve, they’re never going to work.”
She dreams of a healthcare world that’s more accessible, more collaborative, and just… more human. And if she could make one bold, beautiful change?
“I want to help build a world where children with medical complexity are seen not just through the lens of what they need, but through the lens of who they are. Because that’s where the most meaningful care begins.”
This Is Just the Beginning…
Tovah Feehan’s story is more than one of professional expertise, it’s a reminder that meaningful care starts with real connection. Her work continues to inspire families and providers alike to show up with more intention, more empathy, and more respect for the lived experience of caregivers.
If you’re a provider looking to better understand the realities families face (or a caregiver seeking to feel seen and supported) you can follow along with Tovah’s work through:
- Pediatric Feeding Partners website
- @pediatricfeedingpartners on Instagram
- Our recent ASHA Voices podcast episode on caregiver-provider interactions
We’re also proud to partner with Tovah in our presentations with ASHA and Dysphagia Cafe, where we educate providers on The Caregiver Continuum, a framework for understanding how to build trust and communicate effectively with caregivers who are often navigating far more than what meets the eye. Together, we’re working to reframe clinical and therapeutic spaces so families feel seen, heard, and respected from day one.
Want to bring this conversation to your own team or conference? Reach out to us to learn more about having Tovah and the Caffeinated Caregivers team present on building better partnerships between caregivers and professionals.
